Marriage Counseling

Marital Counseling Can Save Your Marriage

What is a marriage? Marriage is a personal commitment or contract which is fully recognized by the law. This personal contract/ commitment is no different from setting up a business partnership - there are ground rules, responsibilities, rights, duties and sharing of authority. As any healthy partnership any decision that concerns the venture would need equal participation of the partners.

Signs That You Might Need Marital Counseling

It is often that you find yourself pining from the initial courtship days when your spouse was the number one in your life and vice-versa. You wake up one day and realize that there is wide chasm between you both. This would not be the situation if you knew to read the early signs of trouble and checking these in time:

1. Communication - initially you would love to talk to each other about anything. Just sharing your thoughts and hearing the other person's opinion and comments would make you happy. Gradually, the increasing responsibilities of the household, lack of time due to mental and physical pressure would make this spontaneous sharing less and less. Do not let this happen. Keep the dialogue alive at all times and let your spouse know every detail of your day. Communication is the greatest nurturer of a good marriage.

2. Decision making pattern - the best way to handle any problem is by discussing it with your spouse and coming to a common conclusion. The day you feel that you "need not consult" the other is a sign of problem in your marriage. Similarly, if your spouse seems to tackle such problems on his/ her own.

3. Division of home turf - while it is healthy to have your own space where you can let your hair down once in a while, if you find yourself into clear cut "his" and "her" demarcation of areas - then there is trouble brewing. Marriage means a man and wife wanting to be together - and that togetherness should not be only the bed they sleep on at night.

4. Finances - this is one of the major indicators of trouble with the marriage. Are you considering the fiancés as his/ her and mine? If yes, there is trouble. Finances, like everything else in a marriage should be ours. At the worst, it should have clear demarcation about who pays what and this decision should be made together. If and when either of the spouse spends money without informing or caring about the sentiments of the other spouse - there is trouble.

Recognize the signs and start working on them as soon as you identify them. If you catch them early, you can steer your marriage out of imminent trouble. However, if you are not able to do so - you could always use the services of any marital counseling professional. It is advisable that you go to the marital counseling when and if you feel you cannot solve your internal conflicts on your own.

Marital counseling is not like going to the doctor when you are sick - it is more like an emergency surgery which is required when all other medication fails.

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